22 Sep 2014 10:50 | 0 notes | Reblog
Hi, I've read your 'who am I' page and was wondering about something. If it's not too personal, would you mind sharing your experience becoming the man you're meant to be? I'm just some random girl who feels male and confused about changing this - but all the terms people use on Tumblr fly over my head. So yeah, I'm kinda curious about the processes you went through, mentally and physically. Thanks for your time ^^

Not too personal at all. 

Okay, my experience was slightly altered by the fact that I’m pansexual, with a preference to date men.

When I was around, 13 and I’d started dating I knew something felt off but I didn’t know what. I knew I wanted to dress tomboyish and I wore tons of layers, but everything I did seemed to be covered in layers of “femininity”. 

I’d always been a big fan of hanging with the girls in my class, so that wasn’t odd, but I also spend a good part of my time with the guys, throwing around a soccer ball and getting muddy. 

It wasn’t until my Freshman year of high school that I realized what I was. I met a guy at our school’s GSA who was also trans and he kinda, I dunno, opened up this whole new world for me. It kind of struck me at that moment that that’s what I was. Like, I didn’t want to be a girl. Heck no, I’d never been a girl. That there was a reason I preferred to wear boy clothes and that I role-played a guy in stories.

Unfortunately, that didn’t go so well in my mind after some time. I was lost. I was like “but wait, you like dudes….you can’t be a guy and like guys” even though I knew being gay was normal, I didn’t think it was normal when it came to trans guys. I just assumed all trans men had to be straight and very masculine. 

Boy was I wrong. I went on YouTube and started looking up trans videos, first of the transformation, then of the people’s day to day activities. Soon, I realized that I could be pansexual, that I could like guys, and the world wasn’t going to end. 

From that point on I decided to be myself. I started coming out and while some people were confused, I was lucky to have a good support system. I had friends who loved me, my (at the time) boyfriend, and all that.

It’s been a struggle some days, dealing with dysphoria, depression and other shit, but I’ve been okay at the end.

If you have any other questions, don’t hesitate to ask me. And if you’d like to private message, you can always contact me on FB or something. It’s all on my “where to find me” page.



21 Sep 2014 20:50 | 4 notes | Reblog

I went to church!

So, over this summer I stopped going to church after an attempt at going because I wanted to regain my religious aspects. Why? Because as a Catholic, I expected to go to mass and receive communion (bread and wine) and when I publicly came out as trans and bisexual, I was not allowed to receive it anymore.  

This week, my friend Stan invited me to go to church with him. I am so thankful to God that he was placed in my path because it was so much fun. It’s a non-denominational church but it was super fun and the friends he introduced me to were also great. I felt a little odd at first (because I’m barely gonna turn 20) and they’re all in their older 20’s but they were astoundligly friendly. 

So yeah, I’m back in church and it’s in the back of a bar…I kid you not. 

If you’re in NY and you want to stop by, I’m sure you’ll enjoy it. 

Here’s the link to their website: http://barstooltabernacle.com/

21 Sep 2014 12:00 | 424,960 notes | Reblog








I want you to imagine a ten year old version of yourself sitting right there on this couch. Now this is the little girl who first believed that she was fat, and ugly, and an embarrassment.

This is groundbreaking

this is my third time rebloging this today. this is so important.

I have goosebumps

because were all trying to heal the child that was broken


This show is wonderful

20 Sep 2014 18:00 | 61,868 notes | Reblog





Inspired by a friend

This should seriously become a children’s book

I really love this because it shows that no matter what gender you identify as, you can still dress however you want and feel confident.

Yes! Its a huge deal and super important to have this kind of representation! We need more things like this out in the world

20 Sep 2014 11:36 | 0 notes | Reblog

The future… dun Dun DUN!

So for a while I’ve been debating where I want to live post college. For some time, I wanted to do Seattle or San Diego (mostly for reasons of appeasing to someone else’s taste) but you know, with it being like over 100 degrees in LA and San Diego being so close, I don’t think that’ll happen. 

So that leaves Seattle but unless I want to do “newspaper” kinda news, I don’t know if that’ll be my choice. 

Which leave me thinking….I have the whole world practically available. I may stay in New York for some years because it is a great city but I dunno, maybe I’ll follow my childhood dream of leaving everything behind for more than just a semester at a time and being more than a three hour flight away and just say “Fuck it!” and go to Europe. 

Maybe England, maybe Spain (though theyr’e a bit homophobic), maybe France. Or I’ll go with Germany. I’ve always thought it was great and well, I am learning the language. 

Who knows?

I have a few years to figure it out. 

20 Sep 2014 11:14 | 0 notes | Reblog

I woke up around 10:30. Stayed in bed ‘till 12 (only got out to pee) and my roommates are still asleep. 

Seems like  a good day to be a bum.